Dera was betrayed by her best friend, someone she trusted with all her secrets. She loved talking to her about how great her relationship was—how her boyfriend treated her well and made her feel special. But her best friend became jealous and started crushing on her boyfriend. Eventually, she ended up sleeping with him and wanted more than just a one-time fling. “I didn’t know in time that my best friend was crushing on my guy. She would visit him in his house in the pretense that she was in his neighborhood and wanted to greet him. And one such day, my guy slept with her. And their secret affair continued without my knowledge. They hid it perfectly well.....Read Full Article>>
“We had been friends back in secondary school, because of how close we were, we do almost the same things – we wear the same kind of clothes and hairstyles, and have kept in touch after school. Because of her, I had to attend a state university where I could go from home because I got admitted before her. We didn’t keep secrets. When we started having boyfriends, we shared our experiences with them – we gossiped about everything.
“When I met this boyfriend I was already in my final year, and he was already working. He was a big boy; he had a luxury car and lived in a big apartment. He is very handsome and has nice dimples on both cheeks. He smiled beautifully was very caring, and the best man I had ever met. He was like an angel, immediately he entered my life, I began to experience a new kind of love.
“Sometimes I wondered if he was a human being. His only flaw is that he is a womanizer, and because of his cuteness, every girl wants to be with him. I didn’t have a problem with that because he respected me and was good to me. He gave me everything I wanted. And he is very romantic too. He flatters me with sweet words and knows how to cuddle and pamper me like a baby. I usually told my best friend how he cared for me, even during our romantic moments. I trusted her so much, sometimes she would tag along when we hung out. I never knew she would betray me.
“I got to know that she broke up with her boyfriend and wanted my guy all to herself. She asked him to make their relationship open, she was tired of hiding from me. She threatened to tell me if he didn’t make it open. She wanted him to break up with me.
“One night, I was with him. A number kept calling him, and he saved it with a heart emoji. I was suspicious of why he wasn’t picking up his calls because he usually picked up calls even if it was one of his side chicks. He then opened up to me and told me everything. There were days I wanted to visit him, and he would tell me not to come because his uncle was around. It wasn’t his uncle, it was my best friend. I was shocked.
This was the same girl I ran to whenever I needed someone to talk to. I told her everything about my guy, and she even exposed some of the privileged information I shared with her about my health to my guy to make him leave me. Now she is begging me to forgive her. I am so heartbroken. The two people I loved did this to me, I don’t know who to trust again.”
Dear Dera,
This happened because you allowed your friend too much insight into your relationship. It’s usually not a good idea to tell friends how well your partner treats you. If they’re not getting the same in their relationship, they might be tempted by yours. Some things are better kept private. As for your best friend, you can choose to forgive her, but it’s best to distance yourself from her—she doesn’t have your best interests at heart. If you want to continue your relationship with your boyfriend, make sure you’re not holding any resentment and work on forgiving him, too.
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